By Meredith Beug
Everyone is always trying for a four point; nobody wants a zero point. Why? Each individual is taught that the almighty “A” is valued more than the “F.” But isn’t a F the same as a one-legged A? Forget the four—think about zero. Ideas for writing an essay test.
- Wander around the main idea. Never state it precisely. Take a detour that will allow you to amble away from the topic.
- Pad! Pad! Pad! Never develop your ideas. Restate your ideas in generalizations to avoid using supporting evidence. Always point out your repetition with the phrase “As previously noted . . .” It is also wise to repeat some sentences word-for-word.
- Keep your discussion disorganized. This helps the reader keep alert. Ideas for fill-in-the-blank questions.
- Fill in all blanks with dull, flat, incorrect, deadwood.
- Draw an arrow to the margin to answer single word blanks with run-on, fragments, or comma-spliced sentences.
- Add the popular “-wise” and “-ize” endings to words. Say “Time-wise” instead of “Time.” Add etc. to each blank. Teachers just love etc.
Ideas for true, false and multiple-choice questions.
- Write true for false; write false for true. Wrote “T” for “O” and “F” for “T.” This causes confusion when correcting papers.
- Instead of using A, B, C, D, or E, write out the first choice, second choice, etc. Always choose the least likely answer. Suggestion-wise, one last thing: file-ize this list for easy reference. Above all, zero, as stated above, is just as good as A, this is that in a nutshell.